Just recently, Seattle hosted the Penny Arcade Expo, an event based on gaming, and the community involved with it. Developers, fan boys, journalists and people with alternate anime personalities came out in storm to make the event a big success, and a big crowd. Naturally, what is a gaming event without some Tied the Leader thrown into the mix? If you were wandering around then you may have bumped into four Gunslingers without even knowing it. While there were a variety of actual gunslingers present, some with huge guns, others with bodies that kill, I assure you these Gunslingers were not as obvious, but just as deadly.

There comes a time when the anonymity of one’s gamer personality is tested. Some people are used to flying off the handle with any words they can think of to throw at the other team, while others calmly say “Good Game” and keep that frustration under control. The four TTL Gunslingers that went to PAX had the opportunity to test themselves. I will let them tell the story…

L0coM0tive: Sometime in the middle of day two, wandering around the exhibition center I ran into KillaMOMjaro, and she informed me of a 4 TV, 16 player Halo 2 game going on in the console freeplay area, and we decided to go down and check it out. After we got there, she decided to take off, but I stuck around. I grabbed a seat and played a couple of games with the people that were there, but there was really nothing to write home about, except for there being more time in between games then actual gameplay, but I digress.

Then [L askan] called me up to find out where I was, and decided to join me, [Al Capown] in tow. They got down there, and about the time they showed up, somebody stepped off the TV I was playing in, so I tossed the controller to L. We got in a game, and after it was over, the ‘ref’ tried to put Capown on someone elses team. I looked at one of the other guys on our squad and got him to move over, and Capown sat down next to me. It was about this time that one of the boxes started fritzing (keep in mind we were playing on 180s) and they had to go switch out a disk. While they did that, L, Capown and I set up our tags, all with the TTL moniker in front, myself included. The kid that made up the last of the four on our TV tried to put TTL on the front of his tag too, but he didn’t get too far before we stopped him (he had already superbounced on top of Turf).

L askan: He was everything that is timmy. Screaming for the sniper befoere the game started, superbouncing on turf, throwing careless betrayal grenades in hopes of stealing your kills and killing you in the process, squeaking idiotic instructions and non existant locations while his voice cracked. I fully expected at any moment he was going to scream to his mom for some “goddamn chocolate milk.”

L0coM0tive: Game 1: 1 Flag CTF on Terminal. Round 1: We spawn defense, and have a pretty good run, considering all three of us are still adjusting to playing split screen, they’ve managed to get the flag back to their base, but I’ve managed to Ninja the wraith from them and rain hell on anyone that tries to pick it up. Eventually, one of them grabs it in between my shots and scores it from underneath.

No sooner does this happen then [Al Capown] stands up (at least how I remember it) looks over at the other team and says, “There’s no Honor in that score.” Those used to the anonymity of of Xbox live were shocked at the face to face confrontation of a Gunslinger, every single one of them averted their eyes. They didn’t try that shit again. We tied that game 2-2.

The next game they loaded up was CTF on Coag. Now, initally you might think that sounds like a hell of a game. Until you realize it’s one flag. With SMG starts. This game was epic as well, with TTL + timmies coming out ahead, 2 scores to 1 (if I remember correctly). The highlight of this game is the impeccable demonstration of Gunslinger strategy. I was rolling in the hog with [Al Capown] and hopped out on the ramp side of their base (on offense) and dropped down, grabbed the flag, dropped to the bottom and got in to the Hog, and then got the hell out of there. Why is this incredible? Because we did it with their entire team on, in or under their base.

The hog rolled away accompanied by choruses of ‘What the hell? How’d they get that out of there? It took them like 3 seconds!!! Their sniper wasn’t too shabby and managed to snipe me out of the hog, but we still were able to get the score. After that game, the Gunslingers never looked back. Taking victory in every remaining match. Angel will have to fill you in on her strike team-esque performance in a BR start slayer game on foundation, leading the victorious TTL team with 18 kills.

bs angel: The first game I played was random everything on Ascension. I don’t need to tell everybody how I feel about that game, right? I did fine though; the highlight came when I was at shotty spawn and I only had a sniper. A sword guy comes charging at me from the portal exit. I go for a melee, hoping to bring his shields down so a teammate can finish him after I die. So I hit him, and for some reason that confuses him. He begins to back away from me into the corner behind the portal. I can’t get out of lunge range at this point, the quarters were too close. So instead I charge him, smack him again, and down he goes. Asscan and Loco were on respawn so they saw the exchange and got a big kick out of it. Not sure why he never swung the sword at me but I’m not complaining!

Next game was slayer on Foundation with a br start. Why they chose a br start on Foundation after an smg start on Coag was beyond me. Keep in mind the 8 people we are playing are your standard male glitching teenage punks. They snickered when I sat down to play, which I ignored. On this game I proceeded to finish top on my team, going 18-4. We beat them 100-34. I had to leave at that point for another event so I walked past them, saying a simple “good game”. Not one of them even looked at me, much less said anything to me. They all sat there staring straight ahead not talking.

L0coM0tive: You should have seen the shock on the faces of all the prepubescent boys in the room who just got owned by a harmless looking, 5-foot-nothing Ladyslinger. It was amazing.

Good game PAX-ers, good game. There are lessons to be learned by all. 1. Never superbounce on Turf, 2. Always guard the top of the base on Coagulation, 3. Never chuckle when a lady sits down to play, because she might just BR everyone on your team down, and then do it again, and then say “Good Game.”

TTLers at PAX: bs angel, TTL Al Capown, TTL L askan, and L0coM0tive.
Images from Penny Arcade

Posted by Dweezle