D0320 T2208 Y2006You do not talk about fight club.

If you have found yourself reading the thoughts loosely strung together on this blog, you are most likely an ardent fan and avid player of Halo 2 on Xbox Live. Why else [and even more importantly, how else] would you have come here? While my friends and relatives may stop by to make sure that I am still ‘okay’, little of what is spoken here makes any amount of sense to the uninitiated.

This blog, much like hundreds of fansites, has a bit of a one track mind. And thank The Forerunner for that! If not for safe fanboy havens like Tied the Leader [and everywhere else you misappropriate your employer’s payroll resources], with whom would you share your rants and war stories as a gamer?

You can’t take those pearls of conversation to the water cooler, or out onto the street. Oh, no; Mister!

You do not talk about Fight Club.

The general population of gamers has never been healthier. And we need to stick together. No one really knows what we are talking about when we tell them that we cannot accept their invitations to venture out of doors [GASP!] because our clan has arranged a challenge with another clan. To them, it sounds like you are painting your face blue and making your way to Stirling Bridge. Those poor, deprived souls have no concept of the blood-pounding rush that only comes from delivering your opponent’s flag safely back to the glowing circle in the keep of your base.

Nope… You do not talk about fight club. No matter how you try, you will never convince someone who has never participated in an online multiplayer experience how cool you are for scoring a Killtacular in the insanity of a Multi-Team match – just last night. You might as well tell them that you are working on a killer Jedi costume for Halloween. Your fascinating tales of skill and domination will only be met with the frozen stare of someone who is politely masking their pity. Even worse, they may be masking their fear!

Just last week, my morning walk to work through the maze of Downtown Chicago found me chatting away on my mobile phone with a Gunslinger named DTS Wheels. We were catching up and planning some time to train up for an evening of organized gaming against the professional detachment from 2old2play.

As I came to rest at a stoplight, traffic whizzing by at fatal speeds, I let it slip:

“We will have time to sort out the details tonight; but if we have enough snipers in place on the high ground, we should have no problem arming the bomb.”

Did I say that? Yes. Did the trenchcoat standing next to me [the one waiting for the same light to turn Green] hear me say it? Yup! The sidelong glance was unmistakable. What must that poor bastard be thinking?

Do I tell him that I am playing a video game with enough seriousness to warrant a telephone conversation before I reach my desk? Or do I let him wonder which building in the skyline might be gone if he does not tackle me right now. Either way, the explanation would go badly. When the traffic signal changes, I let him get a head start at putting some distance between us, with his briefcase clutched in a white-knuckled grip.

Perhaps Morpheus said it best: “No one can be told what the Matrix is…”

Posted by XerxdeeJ

Comments 10

  1. #LINK D0321 T0657
    Jim wrote...
    I get caught doing that all the time, particularly after Friday night HaloFest with the guys on Live. I’ll be feeling pumped and excited because I did really well and start just rattling off my stats and talking about the games with my wife. After about five minutes of absolutely no comment from her, it dawns on me that she is completely uninterested and just humoring me. Ah, well. She’s simply not one of the initiated.
  2. #LINK D0321 T0958
    JoshScott wrote...
    Yeah. I’m in my computer class right now not paying attention as usual because I’ve been using microsoft office since I was 10 years old. I went to the forum to check to see if anyone had signed up for the sharpshooters pep rally, and was getting sideways looks from the girl that sits next to me.

    Good to see you updated the blog, Deej. btw, I’ll be coming to Chi-town in August with some friends for Lollapalooza, in Grant Park.
  3. #LINK D0321 T1054
    wayn0ka wrote...
    My in-laws humor me, but my father-in-law is the redneck huntin type, and lord knows what he thinks. What I do know is that he actually enjoys watching me snipe people, because shooting is one of his favorite pasttimes. The bastard owns 30+ guns. He just doesn’t get to shoot people, much to his chagrin, I’m sure.

    My parents have always foreseen the day that I became addicted to video games. When I bought the NES with paper route money and then locked myself in the basement to play Rygar and Gunsmoke, my mother decided that I never needed another game system. And I’d get hooked on the most worthless games (ie: Gemfire for SNES).

    My non-gamer friends don’t even try to hide their disdain. it’s a running joke, more than anything. I’ve stopped trying to explain it!
  4. #LINK D0321 T2114
    CobaltNova wrote...
    Monster, that girl looking at you isn’t interested in what you’re surfing on! God! I may be too late but if you’re still in class tell her that you’re studying to be a microbiologist and that you’d like to talk to her about replication.

    I just hope I’m not too late.
  5. #LINK D0323 T1147
    XerxdeeJ wrote...

    All of that is what makes you the Queen of the Hill.

    Make apologies to no one!
  6. #LINK D0326 T0702
    Sparty wrote...
    One time in school, me and a bunch of my friends were talkin about the previous nights matches. well we were talking about “arming the bomb next to the left staircase” when we were right in front of the principal. He kinda did a double take like he wasnt sure what he heard, but didnt do anything about it at the time. His face was funny to look at.
  7. #LINK D0326 T1216
    Neuvost wrote...
    Great blog man!
  8. #LINK D0510 T0703
    Anonymous wrote...
    Dude your blog is awesome
  9. #LINK D0612 T0000
    Lacrimosa wrote...

    DATE: 3/23/2006 11:24:33 AM
    One time I was in the woman’s dressing room, trying on a pair of camo pants that I had been dying to get my hands on, but this lady next to me just would not shut up. My cell phone went off (Truth and Reconciliation Suite :) and it was a friend of mine who I play Halo with whenever I get the chance. We were organizing a live-CTF game at my house later that weekend (hence the camo pants :). We were discussing what ‘supplies’ we would need to have. I mentioned that I was going up to LA to buy some guns (water..) and that he would need to buy the grenades, and that I’d spot him the money(water balloons). I also let it slip that “We only have one shot, make it quick. Bomb-bard them with everything we have.”

    The lady in the stall next to me fell dead silent.

    I tried to hold my face straight as I left the stall and the woman and I nearly ran into one another on the way out, she tried not to make eye contact with me while apologizing, alot. I didn’t know if I should have told her we were just planning for a game this weekend or not.

    I don’t know whats worse, making live-mock CTF games with waterguns to show off your devotion to Halo, or discussing said game/tactics in a dressing room and scaring the woman who just wanted to buy a new sweater….and enjoying it.
  10. #LINK D0612 T0000
    Stuicide wrote...

    DATE: 3/20/2006 11:05:22 PM
    Let’s just say I got caught in the middle of Organizational Economics talking to a clan mate who happens to be in there with me, I mentioned how I went 25-9 and was no scoping people in the face, the stares… were undeniable. However, it is good to know that if a Halo 2 Tournament busted out in class to determine our grades, I’d get an A.

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